‘Of course I remember her! She was the pale, tall girl from neighborhood. Sheila was her name, wasn’t? She was wearing a school bag even in weekends or over summer holiday. I even asked her once:’What are you carrying in that bag?’ I think she was crazy, because she said laughing, that is her dead pet “Mindyourfuckingbusiness”. Then I asked her, weeks after, if she’s still keeping “Mindyourfuckingbusiness” in her bag and she said that the pet is out long time ago… “out fucking with curious people!”.Then she laughed again. I didn’t get it at that time. Now I know- she must have really suffered from that loss’. (Stalker Neighbor, Dublin, 2005)
‘You mean Sheila? I liked her from day one of Secondary. She was my best friend. I mean, she thought me a lot of bad things, such as drinking and wearing make up. I was a boring human being until I met Sheila. Plus she dared to do things I wouldn’t. Sure, technically I was an orphan, I was raised with solid communist lessons, what could you expect from me? I was jealous of how she had that way, of skipping classes and still be on top of everything. She was constantly nervous, jumpy, agitated and an awful lot of times she was tiring me. Every-time she told me “Let’s do something new!’, I would end up getting into a lot of trouble home and at school. She wouldn’t get bothered and make up a whole fiction story that would get both of us out of shit. One day, we were out in the park drinking for like 7 or 8 hours…can’t even remember. When we got back, everyone at home knew I wasn’t at school for the day. So there she is, starting vomiting, you would swear she was dying, telling my grandparents I was minding her for the whole day. The other time she have covered me to go to a rock party with my boyfriend – she arranged a sleepover, and I have no idea what she have told to her family, but they all knew she had a sleepover into my place! It’s funny enough to say, but she was a responsible drinker. I would easily get high and act stupid – but she was following her rule – no sex, no overdose, not leaving with guys away from the group. In this matter, I got carried away more easily and few times she had to slap me really bad to make me come to senses and stop me making a stupid error.
I loved Sheila, her smile and cold clear eyes, her jokes and our hours of planning fun and life. Years I believed she was perfect, and we will be forever young, together and happy! Until that day! I never got that happened, but she was crying for hours. I think she tried to kill herself, and I didn’t understand why. She wouldn’t eat or drink, she wouldn’t sleep or smile – I got to hate her apathy and constant focus only on school. I didn’t love that Sheila – a boring ghost with headsets on, it was like strange voices washed her brain. I tried to find out what’s going on, and I didn’t… until one day, when she came over with a bottle of Vodka, asking me to sneak out of school. And our happy days started again… and I no longer cared to know ’bout her insanity escape.’ (Kate, Dublin, Academic year 2005-2006).